Today
when I went to
pick Lila up from school
I could tell something wasn't right.
Lila walked out with
her para, as she always does.
But today she walked with
her head down when normally
she runs to me with
outstretched arms
as she hollers
"Mom!"
Today was different.
I asked her para if
it was a rough day.
She told me that it was,
but not because of anything
Lila had done.
She told me what
happened while Lila
stood and looked down
at her feet.
There was an incident
in PE today.
The kindergarten class
was playing a game.
When Lila took her turn
the kids couldn't understand her.
They started laughing at her.
She asked them
not to laugh at her.
They kept laughing.
Her para stepped in
and told them that
it wasn't nice to laugh at people.
Where the teacher was
I'm not sure.
I'm sure this isn't the
first time that Lila has
had her feelings hurt at school.
(I'm fairly sure it won't be the last.)
It's just the first
time anyone has told us
about it.
All the way home Lila said
over and over,
"My friends laugh at me.
They can't understand me
when I talk."
These situations come
without warning.
You don't get to think about
what you should say,
you don't get to rehearse.
You have to act.
Fast.
I told my sad little girl that
I was sorry her friends
hurt her feelings.
And I was sorry that they
couldn't understand her when
she took her turn at the game.
And I told her that was why
Miss Julie was coming to
see her every week.
So she can work hard
on talking so that people
will be able to
understand her.
Ugh.
We love Lila's school.
We love her teachers,
we love her para.
We are fortunate
that Lila attends a
school where she is
welcome in the
general ed classroom.
There are little girls
in Lila's class who are
very sweet to her.
They watch out for her.
They treat her like she
is a little sister.
They don't treat her
as an equal.
Lila gets invited to
all of the birthday parties
of classmates who send the
invitations home in the backpacks.
Lila gets invited to none of
the birthday parties of
classmates who don't send
invitations home
in the backpacks.
She is...
One among them.
She is not...
One of them.
The truth is...
Lila is different.
The other kids know it.
Lila knows it.
I don't hate
Down syndrome.
I don't wish that
Lila didn't have
Down syndrome.
Lila is exactly who
she is supposed to be.
I am not sad that
Lila has Down syndrome.
I'm sad about
the way being different
is viewed in our society.
Other.
Less than.
Today I am tired.
Tomorrow I will
pick up the fight again.
The fight for acceptance.
I will take my cues
from these sweet girls
who never, ever
give up.
